


Thaw

by thesevioletdelights



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Anal Fingering, Competent Armitage Hux, Darth Tantrum and his Evil Space Ginger, Falling In Love, Force Mysticism, Gentle Kissing, Hand Jobs, Hot Springs & Onsen, Kyber Crystals (Star Wars), M/M, Post-The Last Jedi, Rescue Missions, Rivals to Lovers to Power Couple, Romance, Soft Kylux, Supreme Leader Kylo Ren, Winter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-01-17
Packaged: 2021-03-15 03:53:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 14,316
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28557180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thesevioletdelights/pseuds/thesevioletdelights
Summary: They have managed cooperation - efficient cooperation, even - in these past months, which is more than enough. And already nothing short of a miracle for both of them.Still. Ren was a fool to think he could simply run off and keep Hux in the dark.-----When Ren goes missing on a mysterious planet, Hux sets out to find him. He doesn't yet know that he just might find himself.For KyluxAdvent 2020.
Relationships: Armitage Hux/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Armitage Hux/Kylo Ren
Comments: 40
Kudos: 246





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> _"But my heart wants a warmer chore,  
>  insists on letting the frozen past go—  
> mile on mile of jigsaw gray,  
> jumble of its own disassembled ice—  
> and rushes down a course that spells your name."_  
> \- Neal Bowers: Thaw

Hux remembers, of course, the very first time Ren had summoned him after Crait. Vividly. The fear that gripped his insides, the cold sweat that broke out on the back of his neck when he saw the message blink across the screen of his datapad. He had wondered, that day, if he should prepare for his execution, this time for real. Shine his boots, put on his greatcoat and hat, dress for an officer’s burial before walking over to Ren's quarters. Not that he had _expected_ a burial. Getting thrown out of an airlock seemed indefinitely more likely.

 _It's a shame the things we leave undone_ , he thought as he stood at Ren's door, staring at the cold, unforgiving steel. _And unsaid_. It came over him again, that same terrible heartsickness he had felt when Starkiller was collapsing around him. He had meant to accomplish so much more. _Could_ have accomplished so much more. All his efforts, the sweat and the tears, the long years spent in service of the Order. They have amounted to nothing in the end. He would leave this world like he came into it: as a disappointment.

Several long minutes passed before he could force himself to enter. Ren was sitting in his chair in the middle of the room, head tipped back against the backrest, eyes closed. He appeared to be asleep, or in some sort of trance. Feeling horribly self-conscious, Hux cleared his throat.

Ren raised his head and looked into his eyes for the first time in two months.

_General. Tell me what you know about the planet Gigor._

Hux stared at him, momentarily dumbstruck by the abrupt request, and even more so by Ren's calm demeanor. Ren had not spoken a word to him in the past eight weeks. He seemed to avoid Hux on purpose, even, turned on his heel and stalked off in the opposite direction whenever they bumped into each other in a corridor. Hux had no choice but to bite his lip and watch from the sidelines while Ren entrusted Parnadee and Engell with the planning and execution of his military campaigns. For a while, he had expected Ren to fail. Longed for it, too, for him to be once again humbled by defeat and failure. And yet, one by one, Outer and Mid-Rim systems fell beneath Ren's feet. The Order was thriving, fae more than it did under Snoke's leadership.

And even Hux couldn't fault Ren for that.

 _Gigor is... located somewhere in the Tynquay sector, Supreme Leader,_ he replied, cautiously optimistic. _It’s_ _a system of no importance to us._

Ren was watching him, eyes sharp like a nexu’s. _No importance, you say? Hm. Go and look up all available information concerning that planet. Read through them and report back to me. I want you to be able to answer any question I might have._

So Hux went. Puzzled, but mostly just happy to be still alive. For days he pored over archived files, sector maps and ancient scout droid reports. They all deemed the planet of little value. Snow-covered and mountainous, with a frosty climate of almost eternal winter. During the age of the Empire, a large number of its inhabitants were rounded up by slavers and forced into labor. Their numbers have dwindled under Imperial rule and the planet was left mostly uninhabited, which at least meant that safety concerns were negligible should the Order want to establish a foothold in the sector.

Evergreen forests, rivers and caves, rough terrain and a cold climate -clearly, this place had nothing much to offer. It was a frozen rock with a mildly scenic flora and previous volcanic and geothermal activity that had helped several natural hot springs to form on the surface.

Nevertheless, Ren must have taken an interest in Gigor for a reason. The planet was useless, both as a natural resource supply _and_ as a base for military operations. This could have meant only one thing.

_The Force._

Hux didn't have to wait long to find out. The first scouts they had sent down to the surface confirmed it immediately, with the exact coordinates Ren had given them. Kyber deposits, located in the caves of one of the isolated mountain ranges. Frozen in peaceful slumber for decades: in the long years of the Old Republic, during the Imperial Era, the Rebellion, and even when the First Order began to focus all attention on Ilum.

No one had found them. Until now.

In the weeks after the discovery, Ren had become oddly focused. Agreeable, even, as much as it was possible for him. The construction of a research station near the kyber caves had begun. Ren and him now had regular one-on-one meetings twice a week, and somewhere along the line, Hux had stopped dreading them. He had turned into somewhat of an expert on Gigor too, in the long months spent overseeing all logistics, engineering and personnel matters. Ren had not changed his demanding ways, and he still held zero respect for Hux’s _very_ busy schedule, but that was business as usual.

For the glory of the Order, Hux could learn to tolerate even Ren.

Besides, the time for petty squabbles was over.

They had work to do.

* * *

_Six months later_

“One standard _week_?” Hux echoes incredulously, his voice, gone up an octave with surprise, suddenly embarrassingly shrill in the quiet of Ren’s reception room.

Ren leans his hands on the table between them, or rather, on the heap of sector maps and blueprints that occupy it, fixing Hux with his gaze. "Do you have a problem with that?"

As a matter of fact, Hux does. Too many problems to count. Six months ago he would have been _very_ hesitant to express any concerns regarding Ren's decisions. Would have gladly let Ren rush headfirst into his sure demise, too, and good riddance. But they have built an entire First Order outpost out of nothing on Gigor since then, with two dozen scientists and engineers working around the clock to create an infrastructure that makes kyber mining possible, and whether Hux likes it or not, Ren is essential to that process. Amazingly, there had been no major hiccups in the work so far, but Ren can't just announce out of the blue that he wants to spend an entire week planetside. Alone. 

He puffs out his chest. Inhales. _Here goes nothing._ “Forgive me, sir, but I don’t think it’s wise being away from the Finalizer for that long. Our patrols have reported sightings of Resistance ships in the sector. It's likely that their spies are already aware of our activities there."

Ren knits his brows and the corners of his mouth droop. Hux has studied his face enough in the past years to recognize this as a sign of annoyance, but not outright anger. Ren looks younger when he pouts like this; every inch the petulant child who’s just been told he can’t play with his favorite toy. “Are you implying that I can’t take care of myself, General?”

Hux wills himself not to sigh. “I'm most certainly not, Supreme Leader.”

“I want all staff off the station," Ren says pointedly. "No engineers, no security detail. No interference. Got it?”

“I don’t see why we can't leave two stormtroopers as bodygu—"

Ren cuts him off with an impatient wave of his hand, indicating in no uncertain terms that they are done with this conversation. “I don’t suppose you’d understand."

 _No, Hux wouldn’t._ Ren never thinks he does. Poor Hux, so simple and narrow-minded and ignorant of the mystical ways of the mystical shit Ren’s life revolves around.

He straightens and clasps his hands behind his back. Gives his wrist a firm squeeze. _Don’t rise to the bait._ Useless to argue with Ren anyway. “Well. Then I suggest you take a light cruiser. I will have one prepared disguised as a provisions supply vessel. It can drop you off without attracting too much attention and pick up all personnel from the outpost. It will return for you in exactly one week. No later.”

He gives a brief nod. Turns on his heel to leave.

“Hux.”

He pauses in the door, turns his head slightly to look back at him. “Supreme Leader?”

“Thank you.”

It's not that the words come as a _complete_ shock, but Hux still freezes for a moment. He manages to school his expression into something resembling nonchalance. His heart should not beat faster at these two simple words from Ren's mouth, but it does; a peculiar warmth is igniting in the pit of his stomach, spreading through his limbs.

He clears his throat and ducks his head, lest Ren notices the flush in his cheeks.“Of course, sir.”

————————

In barely the course of a single day, the talk of hot springs has the Finalizer abuzz.

The staff of the research station has arrived back on the ship - on a brief time-out before they return to their duties, is the official reason - and with them, the news and gossip of Gigor. Hux doesn’t encourage it, but doesn’t forbid it either. He knows all too well that military life on a spaceship doesn’t offer much in terms of excitement. People who have spent the majority of their lives in space are inherently fascinated by terrestrial phenomena. Even Hux himself is not immune to it. He too, had felt nostalgia for certain places. Well, once or twice.

When he enters the mess hall, he finds a group of his lieutenants gathered around a long table, engaged in excited chatter.

“...would love to have a soak in one of those hot springs," a newly promoted officer by the name of Anez is saying. He has his back to Hux and is gesticulating wildly and shoveling food into his mouth at the same time.

“Where are you from?” asks one of the other juniors - _Besand, is his name?_

“Haidoral Prime,” Anez replies, mouth half full. “No hot springs there, for sure. Isn't it Life Day soon? They really should give us some time off for that, I find it ridiculous that we don’t get any leav—“

Besand clears his throat when he notices Hux, and Anez recognizes the universal sign of ‘high command incoming’ immediately. Everyone around the table falls silent. Their gazes swing in unison in Hux’s direction as he comes to stand behind Anez's chair.

"Upari," he addresses one of the officers on the other side of the table, a tall, young woman, who until now had been listening to the conversation with a quiet smile. "Come with me. I have a task for you. The rest of you," he says, glancing down on the top of Anez's head, who, in the meantime, has gone very still, "be mindful of how you conduct yourself in public. Your rank doesn’t just come with privileges. It also means you have to be an example to everybody else."

Upari is already on her feet, alert and ready to go. Hux likes her. She is smart and observant, with the sort of cunning that he appreciates. A worthy successor to Mitaka. She is even better than him in some ways, less easily rattled, which is always a plus in an aide in case they have to deal with Ren.

The others all stand to salute him when he turns to leave. Hux gives them a nod, struck with a strange sense of discontent at their blank, politely neutral expressions. _Anyways_. He won't accomplish anything by taking out his frustrations on his staff. He's been oddly restless, somehow, since Ren left, but no use dwelling on that either. There are more urgent matters to be attended to.

He ushers Upari into a meeting room and shuts the door behind them. Walks up to the wide viewport and pauses in front of it. The fleet stretches beneath his feet: cruisers and freighters, aircrafts big and small, scuttling to and fro like countless ants, and the star destroyers, heavy, grey beasts of burden, hovering above them. A stunning display of efficiency, technology and power. All part of the great machine.

"Upari," he starts. "I wouldn't ask this under other circumstances, but I need transportation to Gigor to be ready at a moment’s notice. Regardless of day or night shift. A light cruiser to reach orbit, with a short-range shuttle on board. For the cruiser, the two pilots are sufficient. No other personnel. As for the shuttle... let's say the rest is on a need-to-know basis, but should it come to that, your main directive will be to fly me down to the planet's surface, then fly me and the Supreme Leader back to the cruiser." He gives her a stern glance over his shoulder. "Understood?"

"Yes, sir." A simple acknowledgement, no questions asked. The sign of a well-trained soldier.

"Very well," Hux nods. "That's settled, then. I will comm you if you are needed."

Upari salutes and exits the room, and Hux turns back to the viewport to watch a group of TIEs chase each other back and forth between the star destroyers. He thinks about the trackers in the two speeder bikes down at the station on Gigor, the ones he had a technician install in secret before they pulled everyone out. A simple device placed behind the repulsorlift engine, small and inconspicuous, a status report sent periodically to his personal inbox. Nothing to worry about as long as Ren stays on the station, like he is supposed to. But Hux is almost certain that he has other plans. 

Ren would be furious if he knew. He would, without a doubt, consider Hux going behind his back a personal attack. A breach of trust.

He lets out a quiet huff of amusement. Ironic, to think about trust where him and Ren are concerned. Nothing of the sort has ever existed between them - he's not even sure if it does now - but they haven't had a need for it either. Relying on another's trustworthiness is not the only, or often even a good way to accomplish one's goals. They have managed cooperation - efficient cooperation, even - in these past months, which is more than enough. And already nothing short of a miracle for both of them.

Still. Ren was a fool to think he could simply run off and keep Hux in the dark. As Supreme Leader, his actions have consequences. Everything he does affects the First Order, even if Ren himself is too self-involved to realize it. Hux can't track him in real-time, the Finalizer is too far from the planet for that, but at least, there is a failsafe.

If something goes wrong, Hux will know.

————————

It's two hours into his rest cycle on the fifth day when the alarm on the tracker goes off.

Hux jolts awake in bed at the sharp sound, eyes snapping open. _Fuck_. He must have been in the middle of REM sleep, too, because everything is out of focus for a moment, the memory of a dream interrupted still lingering on the edge of his mind.

_Warmth. Comfort. The feel of a large hand stroking the back of his fingers, tracing a path over the skin of his palm. Soft lips brushing across his cheek in a whisper-light caress, leaving in their wake an aching longing for affection, a longing he had not felt in years, not since he was a child._

Hux shivers and rubs his eyes. Sits up in bed, fumbling for his datapad in the dark. The skin on the back of his neck prickles when he glances at it: it’s blinking rapidly with an alert from the tracking software, two bright red words flashing on the screen. _SIGNAL LOST._ For a long moment he sits motionless, staring at the device in his hand. A thought pushes itself to the forefront of his mind, gnawing at it, more treacherous than any other idea he had ever dared to entertain in Ren’s presence.

_You could ignore this. It would be so easy._

_Click delete, and Ren could be gone, gone from your life forever._

He can see it already, the sequence of events that would follow. A somber, Galaxy-wide announcement. A grand memorial, broadcasted in every system. Himself, with a black armband on his uniform, standing on a podium in front of legions of stormtroopers and the high command. The first lines of a speech are already forming in his head, more grandiose and powerful than anything he had ever composed. _We will not crumble in the face of this tragedy. We are shaken, but we are not crippled. The First Order has not - I repeat, has_ not _\- been left without capable leadership and I will_ personally _ensure that—_

He sets the datapad down with a sigh. Gets up and goes to the fresher. The motion sensor light comes on as he enters and he catches sight of himself in the mirror above the sink. His reflection stares back at him: mouth set in a tight line, a scowl twisting his brows. The usual Hux, maybe somewhat paler, the dark circles under his eyes slightly more prominent. The sleeplessness of the past few cycles _has_ been catching up with him.

He shakes his head, dispelling the image of himself delivering Ren's eulogy to the Galaxy. Splashes water on his face. Goes back to the bedroom to retrieve his comlink.

Upari answers almost right away.“Sir?”

“Ready the cruiser, lieutenant. We’re going planetside.”

“Sir," she says curtly, and with a click, the line goes silent.

————————

Hux strides down the corridor of the staff quarters, keying the doors open one by one with his override code. It's just him here now, he sent Upari and the shuttle back up to the cruiser after they had concluded that the research station was empty, with instructions to return in twelve standard hours. Nothing indicated a struggle or an altercation, so they could rule out an enemy attack at least. No one had forced their way in. Ren just simply... vanished.

Along with one of the speeder bikes.

Hux stood in the hangar and sucked his teeth, fuming at the sight of the empty parking spot. He had been pacing up and down the whole three hour journey in hyperspace, and his irritation turned to a hot flare of anger when he found Ren gone and his suspicions confirmed. _Fucking Ren._ Getting himself into hell knows what, and leaving Hux to clean up the mess. Again.

Whatever was going on here, it was way above Upari's paygrade, and if Hux was sure of one thing, Ren not wanting a subordinate to be privy to his affairs was it. _No choice but to deal with this alone._

The room Ren has moved into is the third door down from the end of the corridor, and it takes Hux some time to find it. It's surprisingly small, but so are all the rooms on the station, furnished with only a computer terminal and desk, a single bunk with a horizontal viewport above it and an attached ‘fresher. The First Order doesn't provide abundant luxury to its members. Hux makes a mental note to review the living arrangements for the research staff later regardless. This project is important. They can at least have quarters that are bigger than a prison cell.

He crosses the room - it only takes him four strides - to inspect the items scattered across the desk. Ren's comlink and datapad, switched off. A couple of scrolls in a language he doesn't understand. An utility brush, a silicone impregnated cloth, a few cleaning jags, tools Ren must have used to do maintenance on his lightsaber. Ren's presence is palpable here. He already inhabits this space, no matter how temporary it might be. Owns it, like he owns every room he enters.

Hux is about to turn away when something catches his eye. It's a simple black durasteel box, in the shape of a perfect cube with sharp, smooth edges. When he touches his fingers to it, the lid pops open and a soft, opalescent glow fills the room, sending his vision into a blur. He has to blink his eyes before he can make out the artifact the light is emanating from.

A crystal, suspended in a force field.

No, not just any crystal.

 _Kyber_.

Hux inhales sharply through his nose, fingers fluttering against the edge of the box. _Real, pure kyber._ He's never seen one before. Even after poring over the declassified files of Project Celestial Power and Director Krennic's research dozens of times, he is still no closer to comprehending _what_ exactly it is. He knows its mechanism enough to engineer a weapon around it, but doesn’t _understand_ it. Then again, no one truly does.

Except Ren. Ren has an intimate knowledge of this... _thing_ , a knowledge he has never shared with Hux, not even after they had begun to work together on the Gigor project, no matter how subtly or directly Hux had pried. It stung, being treated like an uneducated simpleton when it came to the matters of the Force - _strip away the esoteric bullshit, and surely, like everything else in the universe, it can be quantified and classified_ \- but now he is beginning to see why Ren has never offered a simple explanation.

Because there is none.

The crystal is mesmerizing. It's not exactly transparent, but not settled on a single color either, instead it seems to be changing hues, going from white to blue to green, then turning yellow and purple before bleeding into crimson. When the crystal glows red, Hux hears a low-pitched buzz, or _feels_ it, rather, deep in his bones; a dark vibration, like a pulsing heartbeat, like a hum rising from the chest of the planet itself, profound and ancient. It reminds him of... - he closes his eyes for a moment, searching his memories for the answer -of... _Ren_. Yes. The crystal is emitting the same invisible waves that always seem to radiate from Ren. It's barely more than a fleeting impression, a furtive touch gone so quickly it almost doesn't register, but just like Ren's proximity, the sensation of it brushing over his skin makes Hux shiver, makes his breath quicken and his belly tighten. _You_ , whispers a soft voice in the back of his mind. 

He snaps the lid of the box shut with a gasp.

He is wasting his time here. He has to find Ren, and find him fast.

The room's computer terminal, like all First Order manufactured technology, is easily accessed with his override code. He pulls up the list of ground coordinates last entered into the system. As expected. The search yields only one result, pointing to a specific location in the nearby mountain range. _Oh, Ren._

Shutting off the terminal with an annoyed click of his tongue, he hurries through the corridor to the main command center. Sure enough, it has a supply closet, and when he opens it he finds what he wanted at once. Parkas, snow goggles and various winter gear.

He shrugs off his greatcoat, and after a brief consideration, his uniform jacket too. His jodhpurs are well suited for riding a speeder bike, but it might be better to wear something less restrictive on top. _Not to mention, warm._ He rifles through the closet until he finds a thick synfleece sweater. Pulls it over his undershirt, then slips into one of the parkas. Grabs a pair of goggles before heading for the hangar. 

The bike gives a pained squeak when he fumbles with the ignition, and _all right_ , Hux has never been a practically skilled pilot, or driver, or anything that requires dealing with actual machinery, really, but he should be able to operate a damn speeder bike, and _won’t this thing fucking move._ He pushes the choke all the way out and throws all his weight down on the starter pedal until the engine hums into life. _Finally_. He twists the throttle wide open and the craft springs forward with a screeching noise, shooting out the hangar doors and into the glaring whiteness outside. And then there is nothing around him except flakes upon flakes of snow as far as the eye can penetrate, and the wind shrieking next to his ear as he tears across the frozen landscape at full speed.

Keeping his head down against the flurry of snowflakes, he glances at the display and the red dot of the positioning system. _ETA less than ten minutes. Not too far now._ He pushes the accelerator down hard and flings the bike against the wind, trying not to crash it as he weaves it from side-to side to avoid trees and rocks sprouting from the ground.

Turns out that ten minutes in the freezing wind and flurry on a rickety speeder bike takes much longer than he had expected. Just when he thinks he'll never reach it, the mountain chain rears up in front of him out of nowhere, like the ridged back of a krayt dragon emerging from the ground. Hux slams on the brakes. _There_. He squints behind his goggles, hoping to make out something that looks like the entrance to a cave.

He sees the other bike first. It's lying on its side, the front half of its twin-spar frame embedded in a pile of snow. He fishtails his own craft to a stop next to it and dismounts with some difficulty, hissing at the feel of pins and needles in his numb thighs, and then he is wading through calf-deep snow until he reaches Ren’s speeder.

He pushes his goggles to the top of his head and leans down to inspect the machine. The trouble is evident at first glance. The ion turbines are dead. They are slightly blackened around the edges, which could mean an malfunction in the inner wiring, but judging from the bike's unfortunate position, it was likely the force of an impact that did them in. The same impact that caused the tracker to lose signal. _Did Ren crash this jumpspeeder?!_ It should be impossible for someone with his piloting skills to run headfirst into a snowdrift. And yet by all appearances that is exactly what happened.

Cursing softly under his breath, Hux straightens to look around, shielding his eyes with his hand from the heavily falling snow. Even if the repulsorlift engine is still functional in Ren's bike, it won't go anywhere without thrust. Two people can fit on one speeder bike in theory, but in practice things might be entirely different, and... _No. Focus. Ren is the priority. The rest you can figure out later._

The mouth of the cave is barely more than a dark crack in the side of the mountain and Hux only catches sight of it by sheer dumb luck. He has to struggle through the snow and break trail for almost the entire way to reach it. He can't detect any sign of footprints or another trail - Ren must have been in the cave for hours now, long enough for the snowfall to cover his tracks.

"I hope you are still alive in there," Hux mutters as he pauses at the entrance to peer into the yawning darkness. "Because I might just have to kill you myself."

————————

It seems a long time before the crevice begins to slope downward. Hux moves cautiously through it, following the narrow, slippery path beneath his feet, feeling along the curving wall with his hand. The wind is strong even in here, its cold currents blowing in and out of the mouth of the cave, making the errant snowflakes dance in the air. By some strange miracle, the tunnel isn't pitch dark: daylight reaches back far enough to illuminate the stones beneath his feet.

He had only once before been inside a cavern - that was a long time ago, back on Arkanis. The ancient seaside caves along the coastline near the Academy grounds had always been a popular subject of conversation among the cadets. Vast, unmapped and battered by the relentless ocean waves, they were fascinating to children, as all mysterious and dangerous places are. He went down there once, on a dare, with two other boys. He was ten years old and he still wanted to belong, didn't yet know that it was something that would never happen for him. They challenged him to play hide and seek among the jagged limestone rocks. _Go, Armitage. We'll count to hundred and see if we can find you._ He hid so well from them, too. He was so very proud of himself. By the time he realized that no one was going to come to look for him, the sky outside had become inky black.

He stumbled along the algae-covered, rocky beach, climbing over slippery rocks and trudging through wet sand, unsure of the way and terrified of the rising tide and the predators lurking in the dark. He only made it halfway back to the Academy before the patrol droids found him, snivelling and shivering in his ruined uniform. He had missed dinner and Brendol slapped him across the face in front of the entire mess hall—

He got his revenge on those two, of course, a good five years later. In the exact moment retribution was most unexpected, and not a second sooner. But the memory of that waterlogged darkness had stayed with him into adulthood, and his aversion to looming, damp and dimly-lit spaces has not lessened.

Out of the corner of his eye, he notices a flicker of light. Farther ahead, he can now see a dull gleam that gradually begins to give way to a brighter, luminescent glow as he approaches it.

After a few more steps, the tunnel widens into a cavern. The glow is suddenly much brighter here, and when Hux's eyes manage to adjust to it, the sight makes him stop dead in his tracks.

The walls are alive with light. A bluish glimmer surrounds him, radiating from hundreds, maybe thousands of crystals in all shapes and sizes. Giant stalactites suspended from the arched ceiling like chandeliers, immense stalagmites emerging from the ground, all glowing with a soft, translucent light, and all Hux can do is marvel at them in wide-eyed wonder.

Ren is kneeling on the frozen ground in the middle of the chamber. He has his back to Hux, his face turned up to the crystals lining the wall of the cave.

Hux holds his breath. Takes a step closer. Reaches out a hand towards him unconsciously, even though he knows Ren can't see it.

“They are not yielding, Hux." Ren slowly turns his head towards him. His eyes are blank, unseeing. Bits of frozen snow cling to his hair, his clothes. He doesn't seem to be aware of the freezing cold, or the fact that Hux has just materialized next to him out of nowhere. _Is this hypothermia? Has he lost his mind?_ He is wearing his cape but no other protection, and a sympathetic shiver runs over Hux.

Ren is now looking at him like he is not entirely sure if he is real or just an apparition, and for a moment Hux doesn't know how to react or what to say. He's seen Ren annoyed, apoplectic, on the brink of a meltdown, but never this...disconnected. Never in a state he didn't know how to handle.

Ren turns his gaze back to the myriad glittering pinpoints of light in the wall. Closes his eyes. “Tell me why I can’t make them yield.”

And he doesn't have an answer to that. How could he? What could he possibly tell Kylo Ren, heir apparent to Darth Vader, about kyber crystals that Ren doesn't already know? Isn't he just a pitiful Force-null, a lesser being who will never reach enlightenment?

_You wouldn't understand, Hux._

"Supreme Leader," he tries, choosing his words carefully. "I've come to escort you back. A shuttle is waiting. We must go at on—"

"No!" Ren jumps to his feet. He whirls around, his eyes wild. The crystals in the cavern light up in unison, their glow intensifying, turning iridescent, flashing red-blue-green-yellow... every color Hux saw in the single crystal back in Ren's room. "Leave me alone!"

The ground beneath Hux's feet rumbles. And then there is a terrible wind rising in the cave, gathering force, whistling through the cracks in the walls with a high, eerie sound. Ren is standing at the center of it, a flurry of snowflakes swirling around him as the whirlwind snatches them up from the ground. Like a black hole, he seems to draw all matter into him, even the light of the crystals for a second. They flicker in alarm, crying out wordlessly, and in the next moment the invisible energy surrounding Ren _bursts_. It propagates outward like a shockwave, razing everything in its path, sending shards of ice and snow flying in every direction. Hux covers his face with his arms just in time to shield himself from another cutting gust of wind and the pelting snow.

“Why?" he tries to shout above the wailing wind."Why are you doing this?”

Ren's hair is whipping in the current, his features contorted in anguish. “Because I have to! Because I want us to survive!”

“We won’t survive if you are fucking _dead_ , Ren!!”

His voice, now barely more than a splintered, pitiful squeak, hoarse from the freezing cold, breaks on his name.

Ren reels back, eyes wide. He’s staring at Hux like he is seeing him for the first time, like it has finally dawned on him that it's the _real Hux_ standing there, in his snow-covered boots and furry parka and his stupid goggles, with open concern and despair on his face. His expression shifts, the anger melting from his face in an instant, dimming first to shock, then astonishment.

The wind ceases.

All around them, thousands of crystals are glowing deep, dark red, bathing the entire cavern in a brilliant crimson light.

Ren gasps and falls to one knee, catching himself with his fist on the ground.

Hux leaps forward without a moment's hesitation, crouching down next to him and looping his arm under Ren's shoulder to pull him to his feet. Puts his arm around his waist when Ren stumbles. Presses his other hand to his abdomen to steady him. "We've got to get you out of here, Supreme Leader." An encouragement half to Ren, half to himself. "And I suggest you cooperate."


	2. Chapter 2

Ren doesn't argue. Not when Hux drags him in the direction of the exit, not when he leads him through the tunnel, away from the glowing crystals, out of the cave and into daylight. He is leaning heavily on Hux, letting him support his - considerable - weight as they make their way across the snow back to Hux's speeder bike.

Hux doesn't even realize that the snowstorm has abated until they have reached the vehicle. Only after he's helped Ren onto the bike and stripped off his parka to wrap it around his shoulders does he pause to look around. The clouds have cleared and he is surrounded by glaring whiteness: the solar flare reflecting off the surface of vast snowfields. A flash of green -the line of familiar trees in the distance. _The station._

"How did you find me...?" Ren asks, with a sudden sharp awareness, but his moment of clarity doesn't last long. He sways on the seat, and only Hux's hand on his chest keeps him from falling forward.

Hux sets his jaw. "Never mind that now."

He swings his leg over the seat of the bike and slams his hand down on the ignition button. Reverses the route in the positioning system, setting it to ‘back to base’, and then they are roaring off toward home. Hux grips the handlebars tight, pushing the bike as fast as he can. He finds it easier to navigate now that the winds have subsided, but at the same time he can feel himself getting tired: his arms and legs have gone numb from the cold, the vibration of the engine and the speeder bike bouncing beneath him. Simply steering the craft in the right direction requires all of his focus.

Ren leans against him with a sigh. His wet hair tickles Hux’s neck.

“What have you done?” Hux mutters under his breath. “You stupid, stupid man."

Ren doesn't answer. He is slumped against Hux's back, head lolling onto Hux's shoulder. Hux feels him wobble slightly when he swerves around a rock. _Shit_. If Ren tumbles off this bike, Hux will never be able to hoist his heavy arse back up on it again. He reaches back with one hand and gives his side a light slap. "Ren! You have to hold on, do you hear me?!"

Ren mumbles something incomprehensible. He still must have heard what Hux said, because his arms are sliding around Hux’s waist, and then he is squeezing tight to him, burying his face in his shoulder.

“We’re almost there,” Hux says when he feels Ren shiver against him. “Just a bit more.”

Despite his optimism, the ride back to the station seems to last for ages. He keeps glancing back over his shoulder to check on Ren, doing his best to keep the bike straight at the same time. He is exhausted by the time he's reached the hangar, parked the bike, and helped Ren off of it and into the command center.

Once inside, he pushes him down into a chair. "Sit here. I'll get you a blanket."

"No—" Ren is forming barely audible words with his blue lips, reaching out a hand toward Hux. "...the hot spring. Help... help me into it."

For a moment, he stares, dumbfounded. "What?”

Ren jerks his head towards a side door. Still doubtful, Hux moves toward it, keeping one eye on Ren as he keys the door open, and... _right_. How could he have forgotten? He's seen it a thousand times in blueprints and holos when they were designing the layout of the station.

From the back door, a narrow stone path leads through snow-covered mossy grass, to three small, interconnected natural pools about thirty meters away. Grey rocks speckled with silver form a gleaming circle around the hot spring, white clouds of steam billowing above the clear blue surface of the water, giving the scene a dreamlike quality. The shadows are longer now than when he had set out from the hangar, and the planet's sky has begun to deepen towards sunset **.**

"Okay," Hux says softly to himself. "Okay." _Let's do this._

He strides back into the command center and kneels in front of Ren's chair, grabbing his leg. “Come on.” One boot off. Then the other one. He straightens, taps Ren on the arm. “Up.” Maneuvering Ren out of his clothes is not an easy task - _why does he have to wear this many layers?!_ \- but one by one the items of clothing come off: belt, tunic, undershirt, trousers, and then Ren is standing there in his underwear, swaying a little on his feet. He leans obediently on Hux when Hux begins to steer him towards the door.

It’s fortunate that the pool is so close, because by the time he’s helped Ren clamber into it, Hux is bone-tired. Cold too, shivering and shaking in the chilly air.

He glances back at the open door over his shoulder. Then at the water again.

His decision is made in a second. It won’t do for him to lose more body heat and catch his death here in his wet clothes. _Desperate times…_ He undresses quickly down to his shorts and then he is sliding into the pool, gasping in a breath as he feels warm water splash against his ice-cold skin. The water only reaches his waist in the deepest spot, the pool small enough to cross in a few strokes. He ducks under the surface for a second to rinse the clumps of snow from his hair, taking a big gulp from the fresh air as he resurfaces. 

Ren is sitting slumped against the stone edge of the pool, head drooping onto his chest. His face is white as a sheet, and the sight makes Hux's stomach clench, a dread more icy than the cold of that awful cave gripping it. Ren looks helpless like this, with his eyes closed and his mouth a thin, bloodless line. More vulnerable than he did in that fateful moment on the Supremacy, and Hux has a sudden flash of memory: Ren lying prone on the floor among the debris, and himself standing above him, reaching for his blaster.

Ren makes a soft sound, dispelling the image from his brain. Carefully, he wades over to him through the water, trying to find footing on the smooth stones beneath his feet.

“Ren!" No answer. _Fuck_. He kneels between his legs and grabs his face with both hands. Presses his palms against his cheeks. "Wake up. You must not fall asleep, do you hear me? Open your eyes, Supreme Leader.”

Ren's eyelashes flutter. “Supreme Leader… that’s not…I’m not— I still haven't..." His body jerks, his hand shooting out to grab at some invisible thing in front of him. Then: " _No_! I need them. I've got to make them _accept_ me—" 

“ _Kylo_!”

The snap of his voice cracks through the still air, startling even himself. For a long, painful moment, Hux holds his breath and nothing is audible but the quiet rustle of the wind in the trees around them. Then Ren blinks at him. His eyes are bloodshot, bleary, like he has just returned from someplace far far away, but his gaze is noticeably more alert now, his face suffused with a sort of puzzled wonder and a gradual dawning of realization.

Hux yanks his hands away.

He scrambles backward in the water, almost falling over when his foot slips on the pebbles at the bottom of the pool.

A hand closes around his upper arm, steadying him with a firm grip. Ren’s hand. It’s broad and calloused, just like Hux had imagined it to be. Only, he could have never guessed it would be so _warm_. The physical contact is almost burning his skin.

He used to wonder, years ago - a lifetime ago - how Ren’s touch would feel. How his big hands would caress Hux everywhere, mold Hux to him in a tight, passionate embrace. They were both young then, and Hux's head was full of fantasies of his co-commander: the mysterious Knight with his hulking body and gruff demeanor and soulful eyes.

Now the grip of Ren's hand is making his blood run cold.

Ren releases his arm. He gasps and tries to draw back, but Ren is already reaching for him again, clasping his hand in his. And then he is lifting it to his face, pressing Hux’s palm to his cheek, and this can’t be happening, because if it is, then Hux is— _he’s, he’s_ — He whines, alarmed, through his nose, fingers twitching against the white ridge of the scar bisecting Ren's cheek as he struggles in his grasp.

“ _Don’t—_ “ Ren rasps, then softer: “Please. _Please_. Your touch… it's good. Helps.” He squeezes Hux’s hand. “It feels like you are touching the Force, all the way through me.”

And suddenly, it’s like his breath doesn't quite reach his lungs. Ren rubs his thumb across the back of his fingers, and Hux feels his knees go weak. He stares, transfixed, unable to pull away, unable to resist as Ren turns his face into his hand. Brushes his lips gently across Hux's palm.

“I remember,” he says, voice low. His gaze is clear, piercing, and color has started to return into his cheeks.“I remember you. After Starkiller. You were there, weren't you. With me. In the transport. I think I... I felt your hand on my face. Just like now.

Hux flushes crimson. His first instinct is to deny it, to brush the ridiculous accusation aside. _How dare you, I would never—_ Ren should have been unconscious - no, he _was_ unconscious, he most certainly was; and yet for some reason he _knows_ , he knows Hux's shameful secret, and how could Hux have been so careless—

_I thought you would die that day. I thought we would never make it to the Finalizer in time. It was a moment of weakness._

“I’ve never said— I wanted to tell you.” Ren swallows, throat working. “Thank you. For rescuing me that day.”

It's as if an iron claw was reaching into his chest, squeezing on his heart. _Now? After all this, you’re telling me now? After everything we went through?_ He wants to shake him, wants to scream, sob, howl until his vocal cords tear and burst, scream until the whole damn Galaxy cracks in half and the void swallows them both. He can feel it building up behind his tongue and teeth, swelling in his throat like a living thing.

_You betrayed me._

_You hurt me._

_You hurt me, you hurt me, you_ hurt _me—-_

_But I still…_

_I still—_

Ren is silent, his expression solemn, almost remorseful. He glances up through his lashes and his eyes lock into Hux’s, trapping him in their dark, liquid gaze. _I know_ , those deep brown eyes seem to say. _I've seen your pain._ He is looking at Hux again like he did back in the cavern: as though Hux had the answers to every question in the universe. Like their whole relationship is in the balance, and it's Hux's hand that will tip the scale.

And _that_ is a lot to process while one is kneeling half-naked between the legs of a rival-turned-superior-turned-hell-knows-what in a hot spring.

Among the ruins of Starkiller Base, Hux saw the mortal man under Ren’s guise of an all-powerful being. He had made his choice that day, and made it again today, when he dragged Ren from that cave and saved him from certain death. Over and over again, he had arrived at the same crossroad. Every time, he chose to spare Ren's life, and not only that - he upheld his reign, acknowledged his will and supported him, supported _them both_ , through ruthless expansion, through victory and defeat.

The other path has been shrouded in a strange fog for a while now, but it’s still a road he knows how to walk. It’s the road of intrigue, of treason, of a monomolecular blade sliding quietly from his hidden sheath to embed itself in vulnerable flesh. It would be easy to go down that path and Hux has had his chance to do so. A hundred times by now. He never took it. And he doesn't know why, all he knows, with a sort of finite, aching certainty, is that he will never be able to break the spell Ren has cast over him. _Not after this._

Ren's nose is pressed into his hand, his soft breath caressing Hux's palm as he closes his eyes and whispers: “I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

And Hux could let that scream out, could rage until he is drained and hollow, but it wouldn't change anything, certainly not the past. He has nowhere to run. Not from Ren and not from his own feelings. 

He sags against him, all the self-control he's been exerting in the past six months - in the past six _years_ \- swept away, eroded like sand by waves of the sea. Ren catches him around the waist and pulls Hux to him, closer, closer, into the circle of his arms. _Stars_ , Hux can _feel_ him, _actually feel him_ , the solid plane of his broad chest, the latent power of his muscles under smooth skin, and Ren is warm, _so big and warm_ ; his hair smells of snow and wind, and Hux can scarcely breathe, much less think.

To look at Kylo Ren, to admire his striking physicality from afar is one thing. Quite another to experience all that strength up close. He should be unnerved by the power thrumming under those muscles, and he _is_ , a little, but somehow, the way Ren is holding him in the water is indefinitely gentle. He's got an arm around Hux's back, near his shoulder blades, where the water doesn’t quite reach, branding his skin with the heat of his wide palm, and Hux should put a stop to this, but he can't, he _can't_ , no more than he could stop his own heart from beating. His skin is prickling with the heat of Ren's touch, the energy between their bodies palpable.

Ren's face is so close. Hux can count every tiny dark speck on his skin, the flecks of amber in his irises. _He really has such striking features,_ his brain supplies unhelpfully. Severe, yet soft at the same time, dominated by that majestic nose, that plush mouth. _Gorgeous._ His heart skips a beat when their eyes meet again. For a while everything is quiet, the gently splashing water of the pool and their breathing the only sound.

A large hand slides into his hair to cradle the back of his skull. Then his head is tilted gently until his mouth meets Ren's, and then Ren is kissing him, hot, deep, with an exhilarating, desperate urgency.

Parting his lips to allow Ren to taste him seems like the most natural, unquestionable thing in the world. He finds that he is more than willing to kiss him back, his own mouth eager for more, opening to his readily, without a second thought. He grips Ren's shoulders and shifts onto his lap, straddling his thighs, and Ren immediately wraps his arm tighter around his waist to draw him closer. His fingers curl tight in Hux's hair as he takes the kiss deeper, exploring Hux's mouth in deep, intimate strokes. His mouth is like heated satin, and Hux is reeling from the heady taste of it. He had never imagined anyone could taste like this, certainly not Ren, never knew this kind of desire could exist. Ren is breathing him, kissing him like he wants to swallow him whole, take in his very essence, and Hux is rapidly losing the last vestiges of his control. He moans softly when Ren strokes the skin at the nape of his neck, the sound swallowed by the insistent pressure of Ren's mouth.

Ren rubs his nose against his when they come up for breath. His body has regained its normal temperature - the effects of the hot thermal water or the kiss, Hux can't tell - and the heat from it is spilling into Hux, warming them both. Ren's skin is hot and slick under his wet fingers and he shivers, suddenly conscious of where Ren's bare flesh has touched him: his thighs, his back, his chest. Heat coils in the pit of his stomach, rushing to his cock, dizzying, unstoppable.

 _Stars_. Ren is now sliding his mouth over his jaw, down his throat, scattering soft kisses over his skin as his hands slip lower, dipping under the surface of the water to settle on Hux's hips, and Hux feels like his blood is on fire. He’s dying, splintering, shattering into a million pieces only to be put together again by the tender caresses of Ren's lips. He's never considered himself easy prey, but Ren is demonstrating an exceptional talent for finding all his sensitive spots: on his neck, and just below his ear - _yes, oh, right there_ \- his lips blazing a trail of liquid fire over Hux's skin. Hux tips his head back and moans again, low in his throat, before he can stop himself. Ren hums appreciatively at that, and suddenly, his hands are on Hux's ass, cupping it through his shorts.

 _Oh_.

Ren tightens his grip. Pulls Hux's hips against his own, and... _oh_ , _stars._ Hux’s breath catches in his throat as the thick, solid ridge of Ren's erect cock presses right against his. _The cards are on the table. No more hiding._ Ren's hot desire is flooding him, mingling with his own, and he rolls his hips against him unconsciously, divulging the evidence of his own arousal, wanting more. _Needing_ more.

"You feel so good," Ren mumbles, mouthing at his throat. "Kiss me again."

It's not a command, not this time, despite the curtness; the way Ren breathes the words altogether different from _finish this, push through, do as I say._ Although presently he finds that yes, he can very much do as Ren says. He plunges his hands into his damp hair and presses himself against him, bends his head to cover his mouth with his, tasting him with a new hunger. The steam rising from the hot spring wafts over their bodies, enveloping them both, the heat of the water fusing them together. The air is brisk, but the wind has not picked up again and the combination of warm water and the chill of the air nipping at his bare skin is wonderfully pleasant. So is the feel of Ren's big hands, their touch sending sparks along his nerve endings as they run over his body, stroking his back, his ass, his thighs, while Ren's tongue sweeps inside to caress the deepest recesses of his mouth. The planet's sun has begun to slide down past the horizon, and the glowing light of the sunset is tinting the sky with hues of purple and orange, turning the water of the pool around them a deeper blue, the fleecy clouds of steam a soft, translucent pink.

Ren lets their lips cling together for a moment before he allows him to come up for air. His hot breath grazes Hux's ear again. “Stay with me tonight. Please.”

"....I’ll have to," Hux says stupidly. "Shuttle's not back for another nine hours." It's not that he’s confused by Ren's request, the implication is clear, and Hux is not that dense. He almost feels faint at the promise of what’s to come. It's just that he _can't—_ It's not easy. To think about what it all might mean.

For him. For both of them.

Ren is now brushing tiny kisses along his jaw, tracing the line of it with his lips, and somehow, Hux's thoughts seem to have gone fuzzy. Even more so when Ren places his mouth to his ear and rumbles: "Then let me make myself clear. I want you to spend the night with me. In my bed. If you're amenable."

And stars, _of course._ Of course he is. Far more than amenable - he is _aching,_ for Ren's kisses, for his embrace. He is not going to simply walk away from _this_ , he knows that by now, and Ren himself appears to be unwilling to break the spell this dreamlike atmosphere has cast over both of them. Has not called him ‘General’ even once. Or demanded an explanation for how Hux had tracked him to the cave. He seems to be content with nuzzling Hux’s neck and nibbling on his earlobe, and Hux could gladly stay here forever and let it happen.

He draws back slightly, leans back on Ren’s lap so he can have a proper look at him: his eyes, now almost golden in the umber light. His lips, red and swollen from Hux's kisses. He smoothes a strand of wet, inky-black hair out of his forehead and behind his ear. Says, with a small smile: “I suppose you want me to keep you warm?”

“All through the night,” Ren replies, with a fervor that makes heat swirl from Hux's chest to his belly. He slides Hux gently off his lap then stands before offering him his hand. “Come on.”

Ren promptly wraps his arms around him when he steps out of the pool, and Hux is quietly grateful that he doesn't have to stand there looking like a skinny drenched cat next to him - somehow, Ren looks glorious even when dripping wet, or possibly even more so, with silvery rivulets of water running down his strong thighs and pearly droplets glistening on his wide chest. He only lets go of Hux to pick up his discarded synfleece sweater from the ground. Drapes it round Hux’s naked shoulders like a coat - an oddly tender gesture. He even allows him to gather his jodhpurs and boots - _better not leave those out here, a good soldier always takes care of his uniform_ \- but that seems to be the extent of his patience, because he is already lacing their fingers together and pulling Hux with him, leading him along the little path winding through snowy grass, back to the command center. Time seems to slow down then, as if in a dream, and Hux moves in a daze as they gather the rest of their clothes, and make their way down the corridor to the staff quarters. It would feel surreal to traipse barefoot and mostly naked through a First Order facility if his mind wasn't so occupied with how tight Ren's hand is gripping his fingers, and with the thought of what's waiting for him on the other side of Ren's door.

The room feels even smaller with two people inside it, but at least it’s warm, and Hux lets out a grateful sigh at finally being inside after hours spent in the cold. Ren keys the door shut behind them and then he's immediately got an arm around Hux's waist again, crushing him tight against the heat and hardness of his body, mouth swooping down to capture Hux's.

He slides his hands up Ren's back, then over his shoulders, mapping his clavicles, his strong, wide chest. An hour ago he had been too busy trying to get Ren out of his wet clothes and help him into the hot spring to take a good look at him. You can’t just stop and admire certain parts of someone's body when you are trying to prevent them from dying of exposure, no matter how captivating those body parts might be. Nothing is stopping him from staring now, least of all Ren, who has gone quite still, allowing Hux to caress him. He hasn’t let go of Hux though - his hands are still curled tight around his waist, and Hux inhales softly when he feels them skim down his back to find the waistband of his wet shorts and push them down over his hips.

Ren releases him to strip off his own underwear - _oh, stars, he’s so…_ \- and Hux hasn’t had his fill yet of _looking,_ but Ren is already walking him towards the bed, pushing him down onto it and crawling on top of him.

He touches his fingertips to Hux's cheek, a hesitant gesture, almost shocking in its tenderness. “Hux. I’ve been... I always—“

“Don't ruin this by talking." He ignores the peculiar way his heart clenches at the words and reaches up to run his fingers behind Ren's neck instead, pulling his head down for a kiss. 

It’s curious how quickly Ren melts against him, the tension in his shoulders dissipating as he lowers himself on top of Hux, hips settling between his thighs. His bare cock slides against Hux's, hot and hard and _big_ , and oh, _oh, fuck_ , _yes_. Ren is too much, almost too much to take in at once, all that breadth and heavy muscle and the _intensity_ , but his body against his feels _right_ , and Hux relaxes under him without a conscious thought, accepting his full weight.

“Stars, I want you so much," Ren whispers. He runs his lips over Hux's jaw, his cheek, one of his sideburns, and Hux threads his fingers through his lustrous dark hair, grabbing the heavy mass in his hand before seeking his mouth again, feeling a wild surge of pleasure as Ren returns the kiss with reckless abandon.

They are devouring each other's mouths now, limbs entangled and hands wandering, soft, involuntary sounds escaping both of them as their cocks rub against each other, and Armitage Hux, General of the First Order, Destroyer of Worlds, discovers that he is a much _much_ less disciplined man than he had believed himself to be. Then again, he has known it for a while. He’d always been a little too emotional, too easily distracted when it came to Ren, but as he lets his hands wander over Ren’s broad back, he finds that he can’t blame himself for it. _Would like to see someone try and resist this._

Ren huffs softly and rolls onto his back, pulling Hux with him. Moving around on the narrow bed is not an easy feat, but somehow they manage to arrange themselves, and end up with Ren lying stretched on his back and Hux half on top of him, his cock pressed up against Ren's hip and Ren's thigh between his legs.

He rolls his hips, slowly, experimentally. Everything is hot and slick now, his cock leaking precome between them, and they both groan aloud when his length glides perfectly against Ren’s damp skin. He rocks his hips forward again, more firmly, sliding himself against Ren's lower belly. He sucks in a breath when he feels Ren's massive hand brush the back of his thigh along the curve of his ass. Ren is touching him without hesitation, but also with an attentiveness that's almost... reverent, and Hux can't help but make a little sound when a long finger delves between his cheeks to stroke a light, questioning touch from his taint to his hole and back again. He shifts his weight against him, silently begging for more.

Ren’s pupils are blown wide, so wide they almost swallow the dark amber of his irises. His finger is trailing over Hux's hole, petting his entrance gently, not pushing in, only rubbing over the outside in slow circles. And Kylo Ren, who conquers entire star systems, always enforces his will, and never asks permission, glances up with an expression that is almost _shy_ , and says: “May I?”

 _Yes, yes_ , _I want it, I've wanted it for so long_ — The words thunder in Hux's head, louder than a scream, but outwardly, all he can manage is a nod. He brushes his mouth across Ren's lips, encouraging him with a kiss and a squeeze to his bicep. Feels his pulse quicken as he watches Ren wet his index and middle finger in his mouth thoroughly, that dizzy exhilaration and mindless yearning he had felt at the first touch of his hand once again overtaking him. He is dimly aware that the lack of lube could make things difficult, especially considering the size of those fingers… he shivers when he feels them run ever so softly down his spine and align with his hole. And yet, he wants it, wants everything Ren can give him, the pleasure, the pain, all of it. As long as Ren keeps looking at him like this, like Hux is the most fascinating thing in the entire Galaxy. The desire in his eyes is intoxicating: frightening and thrilling at the same time, and it's everything Hux’s been longing for. Everything he deserved. He wants to drown in it, give his entire body up to it, wants Ren to _know_ him, to _see_ him for who he truly is.

Ren is breathing softly underneath him, chest rising and falling, his muscles tensed in concentration. Little tremors are running through his broad frame, as if he’s trying to control himself. The pad of his finger is pressing more insistently against Hux's furl now, and at least the warm thermal water has provided enough tension relief for his muscles to make it easier to relax, but he still hisses a breath when Ren's forefinger breaches him, his grip on his arm tightening. “ _Oh—_ “ Sparks shoot up his spine as the finger curls. Twists, gently at first, then more firm. "Oh. That's— _Ah_!" He bites down on his lower lip, shuddering with the twinge and the building pleasure underneath it. _Don't stop. Don't stop. Don't stop._

“Do you— Does this feel good?" Ren mumbles against his shoulder. He is now stroking his finger in and out in a devastatingly delicious rhythm that makes Hux want to sob. " _Gods_ , Hux. So tight…”

“You’re still talking,” he pants, but he is trembling too, can’t seem to be able to control it. A thought flits across his brain, and he knows Ren will pick up on it, but _never mind that now._ He sees himself on hands and knees, back arched and hips raised, offering himself. Ren is curling over him, pushing him down into the mattress, growling softly in his ear as he slides that huge, gorgeous cock of his into him, _all the way in_ , without hesitation----

He can't help but moan out loud at the fantasy, his hole clenching around Ren's probing finger.

 _I want that too_ , Ren says, only in his head this time, but even in Hux's thoughts his voice is trembling with barely suppressed need. _With you._

 _Next time,_ he doesn’t add, but the words hang in the air between them and Hux's insides flutter with nervous excitement at the promise, at the thought of the two of them continuing this back on the Finalizer. The Supreme Leader and his General sharing a bed under the noses of the entire First Order.

He doesn't have to think about that, not now. The ship is more than a parsec away, floating beyond the stars twinkling above the frozen horizon. It's just them here, in this great white silence, lying entwined in a narrow bunk where Hux is allowed to drink in the taste of Ren's kiss without having to think about his duties, or the war effort, or whether they will still be alive the next day.

Or whether they are going to survive whatever this is between them. 

"Touch me," he whispers against Ren's mouth. "As you like. I want to feel your hands on me."

He hears and feels the growl running through the wide chest underneath him as Ren slides his other palm down his back to cradle his hip, and then there is a bigger push working into his hole, two thick fingers, saliva-slick and fiery, forcing him open. He moans again, tilts his hips up slightly to ease their slide, his muscles trying to stretch and fit around the invading digits. _So good, so good—_ It's mortifying, but he could come from this alone, from Ren teasing his hole with his obscenely large fingers. _Stars_ , two are already a tight fit, and they are nowhere near the size of his cock… The sensation rising within him is familiar, yet electrifyingly novel, the pain just enough so he knows it's real. Hux welcomes it with his entire being, the friction, the sting, the almost too-intense burn, and then the blinding pleasure as Ren's fingertips brush across his most sensitive spot.

Ren is now moving his fingers in and out, long, slow strokes that make Hux's whole body shake. He nips at Hux’s neck and rubs over his prostate again and Hux cries out twice before he gets control of himself, his ass spasming at the amazing, white-hot feeling.

Ren senses his struggle immediately, because of course he does. His lips brush across the shell of Hux's ear, breath hot and ragged against it. “I want you to come. Don't hold back. Think of nothing but your own pleasure."

And Hux has never done that in his life, but then again, he has never fucked someone like Kylo Ren either. With a low moan, he grinds his hips back to meet the push of Ren's fingers, trying to get them deeper inside him.

"Harder," he gasps, close to incoherent now. "Fuck me."

"Yes," Ren says in his ear. He curls his fingers deep, kneading Hux's buttock with his other hand. "I'll fuck you _so_ _good,_ next time, you'll see, I'll make you come on my cock— you will be so open and wet for me, only for me ..."

Such arrogant talk would be infuriating, if Hux wasn't so desperately turned on by it. No reason to hide his desires anymore - why shouldn't he ride Ren’s hand openly? And _fuck_ , he’s always had a thing for Ren's chest, too, those full, obscene _tits_ of his, so he might as well grab one of them. He braces himself with one hand on Ren's pectoral, half-squeezing, half-supporting his weight so he can rock back and forth on Ren’s thick fingers and rub himself against his abdomen.

Ren’s mouth is next to his ear, whispering the sweetest filth into it - _So good, Hux, your pretty cock is so hard, I can feel it, you’re close, aren’t you? That’s it, you can let go now.._. And _yes_ , there it is, the pressure welling up in his tightened balls, that wonderful sensation radiating up his spine, intensifying as he ruts against Ren’s hip, desperate to reach the tipping point. Ren stays with him through it all, coaxing him, kissing wetly at his neck, his shoulder, letting out a little pleased noise when Hux gasps his name. His fingers push against Hux's sweet spot with a final, deliberately firm stroke, and a spiral of pleasure explodes through Hux, pleasure so pure he keens at its intensity, his body convulsing as his cock spurts between them.

“ _Yes_ ,” Ren growls again, pushing his fingers deep, and Hux leans his forehead against his shoulder, ragged groans rising from his throat as he writhes on Ren's fingers, his cock pulsing with hot, maddening beats of pleasure against Ren's lower belly.

He comes back to himself at the feel of soft, lingering kisses on his cheek and neck, his heartbeat still pounding in his ears. He is lying half-draped across Ren, Ren's fingers still lodged deep inside him. He whimpers softly as Ren withdraws them, sliding them lightly across his perineum before leaving his skin completely.

He shifts onto his side to settle against him, sated and languid with post-coital drowsiness. Not any less eager to touch, though. Ren doesn’t seem to be bothered in the slightest by the fluids coating his skin, but Hux still feels his cheeks heat up when he sees the glossy streaks on Ren’s stomach, the gobs of come clinging to the dark trail of hair below his navel. Stars, he hasn’t had an orgasm this powerful in ages. Made an absolute mess of Ren in the process, but then again, isn't that what he’s been dreaming about for years? Slowly, he draws a hand down Ren’s sweat-slick side. Closes his fingers around his straining cock, and Ren gasps, his hips jerking upward. " _Hux_."

“Mhm." He slides his fist slowly down the velvety shaft. Ren shudders all over, eyelids fluttering in bliss as he lets out a soft breath. His large frame trembles, the tendons in his spread thighs flexing, and Hux feels almost sickly drunk with power at the sight.

"Tell me, Supreme Leader." He strokes him again, slowly, tip to root, admiring the thick length of him, rigid and silky, mesmerizing in its sheer size. "Have you thought about me before? While touching yourself like this?"

Ren turns his face towards him, brushes their noses together. Liquid dark eyes meet his, and suddenly it's difficult to focus on anything besides that gaze. "I cannot _stop_ thinking about you," Ren says softly. "Haven't been able for a while now. I could — _oh, fuck, yes_ , that's good, Hux— could never sleep after our meetings. I kept feeling your presence in the Force, kept wanting you..."

"Did you?" Hux whispers. Pauses, fist clenched around the root of him. A rush of shaky exhilaration, _pride_ , even, surges through him at Ren's words, circuiting every inch of his body. "Tell me. Tell me what you were thinking about."

Ren moans, low in his throat. "Your mouth. How your lips would taste. Your ass. Your eyes. How your body would feel against mine."

"Yes." Hux leans into him, presses his lips to his shoulder. Squeezes his cock. Decides not to tell Ren just yet that he hasn't been alone in these thoughts. This is validation - no, _victory_ \- and Hux wants to savor it, hold it close to his chest like a precious jewel, like a secret. 

Ren is... magnificent. His wide chest is flushed, glistening with a light sheen of sweat, his nipples perked. He has three flat dark moles above the right one and Hux bends his head to connect the little specks with his tongue and draw patterns on his skin, tasting the clean salt of him. He kisses the mound of one of Ren's pectorals as he strokes him, faster now, and Ren trembles deliciously with the touch. His cock is hot and alive under Hux's palm, steely hard and slick with precome, and Hux loves it, loves how heavy and huge it feels in his hand. He plunges his fist around him, lifting, twisting his palm around the wide head, smearing the wetness over it before sliding back down; and Ren rolls towards him, buries his nose into his neck and _whines_. He reaches down and grabs Hux's ass, squeezing it hard as he starts to thrust into Hux's hand.

" _Oh_ , you're so good," Hux breathes, delighted by this sudden display of possessiveness, "You like it when I touch you like this, don't you. My Ren. _Kylo_. My good, big boy."

"Yours," Ren whimpers, burrowing closer, hot mouth nuzzling over Hux’s shoulder. " _Please—_ I'm— it feels—"

 _Extraordinary_. Although to Hux, it's mostly the knowledge that he's been capable of holding this much power over Ren all along, with merely the touch of his hand. Six months ago, he would have used this information to his advantage without a second thought. And well, he is still going to. It’s not every day one discovers that Kylo Ren can be reduced to an obedient pet with a few caresses and kisses. Hux feels lightheaded with lust and the possibilities. If he could have Ren under his control like this... the things he could accomplish - _they_ could accomplish - would be unfathomable. He lets his hand drift lower to cup Ren's heavy sac. Rolls balls lightly with his fingertips, and Ren groans into his neck, lifting his hips eagerly into Hux's touch.

"That's it," Hux whispers. Feeling bold - or reckless, maybe - he wraps his hand around his cock again and repeats: " _Kylo_. Show me how good it feels."

At the sound of his name, Ren whines again, breath hot on Hux's skin. Hux grips him tight and strokes hard, relishing down to the deepest corners of his soul the way that big, beautiful cock flexes steely hard in his hand. Ren is thrusting up into his fist, fucking into it, off-balance and demanding and urgent, and he glances down between their bodies, watching as the wet tip squeezes up and out of his fist, again and again and again... Ren lets out a low, long moan and spasms, the muscles in his abdomen tensing, and a thick white rope of come spurts over Hux's hand and wrist. It takes his brain a second to catch up to the fact that the Supreme Leader of the Galaxy is _coming into his hand_ , and coming _hard_ , groaning and shuddering as his cock flexes and come shoots out of it like a fountain, coating his belly, his chest, a few drops splattering even Hux’s stomach. The entire display is the most erotic thing Hux has ever witnessed in his life. He strokes Ren root to tip hard and fast, enthralled by the sight of his spend seeping out between his fingers, hot and sticky and wet, as Ren shoots again and again, breathing Hux's name like a quiet prayer.

\----------

They succumb to exhaustion afterwards, both in desperate need of restoration, Ren even more so than him. He is fast asleep in a second, having curled himself around Hux immediately after coming down from the high. The thought of cleaning up only crosses Hux's mind for a brief moment before the need for skin-to-skin contact overrides it, and then he is drifting into blissful, dreamless sleep.

He wakes to pale light streaming through the viewport. It's snowing again, and the falling flakes have turned the outside world an infinite milky-white, but it is unmistakably morning, and he listens for the familiar beep of an unread message in the silence. His comlink, however, in the pocket of his greatcoat, is quiet. They still have time. And it's good, so good that they do, because he is not sure he would be able to leave the sanctuary of this bed or part with the comforting warmth of Ren's body nestled against him. Not that he is currently able to move, anyway, not with Ren's head pillowed on his shoulder and his heavy arm draped across Hux's chest. His hair is like a dark, rippling cloud, silky-soft under his fingertips when he lifts a hand to stroke it.

And he would gladly fall back asleep and let him rest a bit more too, but Ren is already stirring at the feel of fingers threading through his hair, letting out a soft hum. He shifts the slightest bit to nuzzle into the hollow of Hux's throat, but doesn't pull away, only lays his head back down on Hux's chest and says, voice low and rough from sleep: "The crystals in the cave... I felt their awakening."

Hux holds his breath. Anticipation prickles along his spine, his instincts telling him that he must allow Ren to speak. They are on the brink of something here. Something important. He runs his hand over those dark locks again. _Tell me._

“I saw them," Ren says, after a long pause. "Through a vision in the Force. They were _meant_ to be mine. But I couldn't pin them down.” He turns his face into Hux’s chest. Exhales a shaky breath. “I tried. I went to that cave every day and tried.”

Hux's heart turns over in his chest. _You did. You really did. Oh, Ren. I knew that kriffing stubbornness of yours would be your downfall one day._

“The water… the hot spring, helped with the fatigue,” Ren continues. “At first. Then it took me longer and longer to recover, and I— I don’t know, blacked out at some point, I guess. Found myself in the cave without remembering how I got there. Because I was unbalanced. Unworthy. And they had sensed it. Instead of bending to my will, they drained my strength.”

And there it is again, that terrifying image, burning behind his eyelids. Ren’s vacant gaze, his bloodless face contorted with pain. A freezing wind howls, stabbing icicles into Hux's heart. _I have to do this. I want us to survive._

He opens his eyes to find dark, luminous ones looking up at him, gleaming with an intense, clear light. “And then I saw you. Your presence... sharpened my focus. If it wasn't for you, I'd have failed.”

Suddenly, keenly, he remembers a passage in Krennic’s research. He had found it both fascinating and outlandish on his first read, couldn't make head nor tail of it, really, but the words are coming back to him now, taking on a new meaning.

_The permutations in the kyber are comparable to emotional shifts in a sentient being._

A shift.

A _change_.

Ren swallows. "I didn't know who I was anymore, after... after everything.” _Crait_. _Skywalker_. “Who I should be. I'd hoped you could tell me.”

He hadn’t— hadn’t expected that. Had always been certain that Ren didn't care for his counsel, didn't care for _anyone's_ opinion besides his own. And yet, those large brown eyes are still looking up at him, filled with hope and a curious longing, and maybe _this is it_ , his chance to say the words he had always lacked the courage to say.

“I never," he tells him, "Never wanted you to be anything else than what you already are. The Order doesn't need a new Vader. It doesn't need Ben Solo. Yes, not even him," he says firmly when Ren shudders a little at the name and burrows closer to him. "What it needs is a strong leader. A _dedicated_ leader." He slides lower in the bed next to him and turns onto his side so he can look directly into his eyes. "And you can be exactly that... Kylo. You already are. This is all I wanted. For you to realize it.”

He barely has time to finish the sentence before big hands cup his face and then his mouth is smothered by Ren's warm lips - _Kylo’s warm lips,_ his brain corrects itself, his heart racing at the thrill of calling him by his name, _his true name_ \- and then Kylo is kissing him, deep, long, with an intensity that makes Hux's pulse leap with excitement, his mouth moving over Hux’s in exquisite and achingly sweet tenderness.

"Stay here," he instructs after he has released him, his expression when he gets up from the bed so serious that Hux has to smile a little. Kylo has nothing to be concerned about. He has no intention of going anywhere, not for another hour at least. Maybe the 'fresher, in a bit, after he's had his fill of being held and caressed. Not that he thinks he'll tire of the feel of those strong arms around him anytime soon.

He can't help but sneak a glance at Kylo as he walks over to the desk on the other side of the room, sliding his gaze over his broad shoulders and back, his muscular ass. Drinks in the sight of his heavy cock swinging between his legs as he returns to Hux's side, carrying the black plasteel box. This is the first time they are alone together with no barriers between them, with no protocol separating them, and Hux wants to commit it to memory, remember this feeling forever.

Kylo places the black box on top of the sheets. Sits down on the edge of the bed. “You know what’s inside this.”

He holds his gaze, unflinching. “I do.”

Kylo nods. “I felt your Force-signature the moment I've touched it.” _And surely that can't be, but— “_ Yes, you have one too," Kylo says. "All living things do. The ones of Force-nulls are weaker, but… it’s easy for me to recognize yours. Always has been." He smooths his palm across the lid of the box. "I’ve tried to bleed this crystal many many times, but never succeeded."

And never before had Hux felt that his fate hinged on a single piece of rock - _but then again, it's more than just a piece of rock, isn't it_ \- so precariously that he has to hold his breath as Kylo opens the lid of the box. A deep, crimson luminescence envelopes them. The crystal is emitting a steady red glow, burning bright like an ember, and finally, he is allowed to exhale.

He covers Kylo's hand with his. Closes the lid of the box. “It’s done. They are yours.” Sinking back against the pillows, he lets his thighs fall open, displaying his nakedness, his hardening cock. _And so am I._

Kylo must be thinking the same, because he is looking at him with outright hunger, with an expression of pure adoration and wonder, and Hux smiles softly to himself. _But you are mine too. Even if you don't realize it yet._

It's almost instinctive now to reach for him, to pull him down into the bed, and Kylo follows instantly, sliding under the covers next to him, opening his arms wide for Hux to cuddle into his side. Hux trails his fingers down his chest, his stomach, relishing the soft rise and fall of his breathing, the warmth of his skin.

"Are you going to tell me how you've found me?" Kylo asks.

Hux hides his smile against his chest. "Maybe later. For now, chalk it up to my exceptional prowess, Supreme Leader."

Kylo lets out a huff of an amused breath into his hair. "I shall do so. For now. I assume you've also arranged for transportation?"

He nods. "The shuttle should be here soon. We will be back on the Finalizer in a few hours." Not entirely sure why, he adds: "Just in time for Life Day."

“Life Day," Kylo echoes pensively. "Haven’t thought about that for a while. My mother had always insisted on proper celebrations. Dinner. Family visits. Excruciating.”

The word triggers a memory, a faint recollection of a faceless woman, warm and affectionate, the sound of her laughter like glittering icicles clinking together. He is about three years old, scrawny and always cold, and she pulls him into her lap as they settle in to watch the wood crackle in the fireside. He finds he can't talk about that, not yet. He's not even sure if it's anything more than just a fragment of a child's dream.

“It never snows on Arkanis," he says instead. "The climate is too mild. Mostly just rain."

“Do you like it here?"

He does, surprisingly enough. Space and the Finalizer is home, and he is not ready to give that up anytime soon, but— "Yes." He could see himself here. One day. Maybe.

“I am connected to this place. But that doesn’t mean it belongs to me. I need someone— I need _you_ to help me harness its power. With what we have here, the Order will become a true Empire.”

“I might remind you that my last project was a failure.”

“Failures,” Kylo says. “We both had our fair share of those. Maybe it’s time to do things differently.”

Co-commanders. Rivals. Enemies. Reluctant allies. They had been so many things to each other already, Kylo Ren and he. And in this moment, they are on the verge of becoming something else. _Possibly something more._

He turns his face in his chest. Breathes in the scent of his skin. Warm. Alive. _His_. “Maybe it is.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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